Networking without pretence: keep relevant contacts and make honest requests
A superintendent has worked well with the same electrical foreman on several projects but rarely contacts him between them. He dislikes networking events and does not want every exchange to sound like a job request. He wants a practical way to maintain useful working relationships.
Start with people you have actually worked with and a reason to keep in touch that respects their interest and time. Ask what contact is welcome, share permitted useful information and make specific requests when you have one. A contact list supports relationships; it does not guarantee an introduction, market information or your next job.
Build a contact routine you can sustain
- Choose relevant relationships. Consider colleagues, former supervisors, trade partners, consultants or supplier contacts whose work you understand. Include different perspectives where useful instead of forcing one person into each of five categories. A short list of real relationships is easier to maintain than names collected without a shared context.
- Check the welcome contact arrangement. Ask how and whether the person would like to stay in touch. Use contact details appropriately and keep any preferred boundaries in your notes. Do not assume that having worked together authorizes repeated personal messages, adding someone to a sales list or sharing their number with others.
- Offer something relevant and permitted. Share a useful public resource, an appropriate work update or a question genuinely connected to their experience. Keep confidential project and employer information out of the exchange. You do not need to manufacture a favour or send a message only to keep a calendar quota.
- Choose a reasonable review rhythm. Set a reminder to consider whether there is a suitable reason to reconnect, then respect the person's response. Twice a year can be a personal planning idea, not an obligation for every contact. A changed role or limited interest may mean another approach or no further follow-up.
- Make requests clear and easy to decline. Explain the question or role you are exploring and why this contact might know a useful next person. Ask whether an introduction is appropriate before using another person's details. Do not imply they owe you employment help because you previously shared a useful article.
- Keep an accurate relationship record. Note the actual conversation, agreed next step and any permission to introduce someone. Mark uncertain information for checking through the responsible source. Separate a friendly exchange or possible opening from an actual offer so your career decisions do not rely on an assumed commitment.
Common mistakes
- Keeping names without a real or relevant relationship.
- Sharing private details to make a contact message feel useful.
- Treating previous help as a debt requiring a referral.
Action list
Keep the contact plan modest
- Actual relationship and relevant perspective.
- Welcome contact route and boundaries.
- Permitted useful subject.
- Suitable review reminder.
- Specific request and permission.
- Agreed next step without an assumed offer.
Check your understanding
A former colleague gives you another person's name. Can you treat that as a job lead?
Show the answer
Check whether an introduction or contact is welcome and what was actually offered. A name can support further investigation without establishing a vacancy, recommendation or employment commitment.
